• person: how long does it take to get there?
  • me: 3 songs

406,695 notes


Paris Hilton does laundry

Paris Hilton does laundry

(Source: octopussoir-)

68,283 notes

chessys:

stop leaking female celebrities nudes and start leaking the sims 4

31,929 notes

anotherpunk:

"Your dress is too short."

Thanks, the designer used your dick for inspiration.

313,022 notes

pawsitiv:

itseasytoremember:

insert-awesome-title-here:

finalellipsis:

good morning, here’s your newspaper.
…and a little dance.

He’s so proud of himself.

“We just got a letter, we just got a letter, we just got a letter, i wonder who it’s from!”

my heart just melted

pawsitiv:

itseasytoremember:

insert-awesome-title-here:

finalellipsis:

good morning, here’s your newspaper.

…and a little dance.

He’s so proud of himself.

“We just got a letter, we just got a letter, we just got a letter, i wonder who it’s from!”

my heart just melted

(Source: togifs)

565,103 notes

singingsh0wtunes:

subway sure doesn’t mess around when it comes to puns

singingsh0wtunes:

subway sure doesn’t mess around when it comes to puns

155,160 notes

rnicrophone:

bombing:

cop: who the hell ordered all these pizzas

me: you said i got one phone call

image

Order donuts next time.

Damn fool.

362,911 notes